Love notes from God

You know, I've had some hard days. I've had some hard weeks. I've had some hard years. I don't know how long this current hard time is going to last, but I'm just focused on enduring it well.
I have a lot of help in this too, becuase God keeps sending me love notes. I keep getting just the message I need at that moment, through the scriptures, through books, through friends (my angels.)
Today, for example, God sent a note through a friend and got it to me right before Sacrament meeting started. She spoke a simple verse, and I don't know if she even knew what it would mean to me because I don't think she even knows the extent of my trial, but she knew she needed to say it in that moment and I will always be thankful that she was God's postman today.
Thank you, Lord, for the love note. Message recieved. Love you.

So tired

My husband is on another business trip. We had to get up really early this morning to get him to the airport before church. Then we rushed home to get ready for church, but made it in plenty of time. I'm going to write this and head to bed.

Lord, thank you for his job. So many are out of work, so many have struggled so hard, and we have been immeasurably blessed in our job security.
Lord, thank you for the kids being good in church today, it was an unexpected blessing to have all three of them so sleepy, but also so good.
Lord, thank you for helping me with my temper this week. I still have a long way to go, but I did better.
Lord, thank you for that little frog last night, he was just so cute.
Lord, thank you for the dog finally learning frogs don't taste good too, it's so sweet to see that he is growing up.
Lord, thank you for Maider and Nkaujzoo and their enthusiastic support.
Lord, thank you for my gifts.
Lord, thank you for helping me turn out as someone with good self esteem, even if I get a little big headed at times.
Lord, thank you for raspberry vinaigrette, and how yummy it is in a salad with strawberries and blueberries.
Lord, thank you for continuing to sustain Kelley through her illness so that she might do so much good.
Lord, thank you for the Tadlocks and the way they care for me and I for them.
Lord, thank you for my health. I take if for granted, but I am so very blessed.
Lord, thank you for the kids doing so well on the End of Grade tests.
Lord, thank you for helping me get that schedule written.
Lord, thank you for being my rock amid the churning sea of life. I know I can always count on you.

Lima beans and other things

I'm tired, I should have been in bed ages ago, but I'm not, and I'm feeling reflective, so let's see what comes out.

First off, I will admit that I'm re-using here. A bunch of us are having a long spiritual discussion, and this faithful brother posted about Alma's parable of the seed. So, this was my response:

So funny you should post this today. I have very black thumbs. I'm a natural born plant killer.

However, we've been doing that Lima bean in a bag with a paper towel thing at work with the kids. I started one, then a week later started another and so on.

I was shocked at how much bigger it was in just a week, it had nearly doubled in size. It soaked up so much water, and had grown so much in a short time. In the next few days it already had a little root. I was so excited to see it.

Now it has a stem that is over an inch long, and it's just amazing to see how much growth can come from just a little care, a little warmth, a little bit of water, a little time.

It makes me so sad to think of how often we deprive our testimonies of that. We grow cold, or we dry up, or we get impatient. Then we want to blame God for not making our seed grow, when what have we given it?

We need to cultivate our testimonies, we really do. We need to put them in a safe, sunny, moist, place. We need to not block out the things they need. We need to be patient and understand that growth takes time, and that it's a miracle each time it happens.

Yes Lord, for the first time in my life I am thankful for Lima beans.Thank you for what they have brought to me.

Lord, I would also like to thank you for that thread, it's so nice to have a safe place to share my spiritual thoughts.

Lord, thank you for writing too. I'd say I'd be lost without it, but I've rather proven that fact recently, being between books. Those short stories may not be much, but the process of writing them fills me and calms me so much.

Speaking of calm, it was unsettling to read those verses in the bible, so unexpectedly after all this "Rapture" stuff. The way you spoke peace so powerfully to my soul during my prayer, well it was unspeakably beautiful. I don't need to know when, and really, I'm not even going to pull out revelations and try to figure it out right now, because I trust you. Thank you for reminding me of that.

Lord, thank you that my brother graduated this week. He needs this success, and he needs to be out in the world. I'm so proud of him, and I know you are too. Thank you for all the help thou hast sent him along the way.

Thank you Lord that my kids rooms were clean already so I didn't have to make them clean them today.

Lord, than you for reminding me that I needed to buy socks, the situation was getting dire.

Lord, thank you for Adele's success. I know this has little to do with me, but it is so nice to see a chubby woman at the top of the charts. It really is. Please help her handle the success well.

I am very behind

Sad how short a time it has taken me to get to the tri-monthly post habit.
Sigh.
I'm just so blah right now, I don't know if I'm going to be able to do this, but I'll try.

I'm thankful for my church. I attended three "Praise and Worship" meetings at a camp this weekend and Sacrament Meeting with three wiggly kids is more powerful and spirit-filled for me.

Lord, thank you for the gentle glow of the spirit that I know so well.

I got to perform at Campfire. The thing about that kind of camp is that they don't ever jeer or boo, so a standing ovation was almost guaranteed. I'm not sure what they really thought about "Jesus Street" but being up there and singing my heart out while a hundred people clap out a beat was very nice. I don't get to perform often.

Lord, thank you for getting to perform in such a good environment.

I just had rice in my burrito. I don't know why that makes burritos so much better, but it does.

Lord, thank you for rice in my burritos.

The dreaded End of Grade Tests begin tomorrow for my older two. They are worried. I'm not really worried. I sure do appreciate not having homework for either of them though.

Lord, thank you for a night off of homework, for two of them at least.

I filled out the paperwork for my kids to go to summer camp at work this summer.

Lord, thank you for options that will get my kids out of the house so they don't keep waking up their Dad this summer.

I slept in my own bed last night. The beds weren't too bad at camp, but they were a reminder of how nice my own bed is.

Lord, thank you for a nice soft bed in a climate controlled house.

I saw some really beautiful scenes on a nature walk with a friend. I was sad I didn't have my camera, but I did stop to enjoy them.

Lord, thank you for simple scenes of great beauty.

My kids missed me.

Lord, thanks for the relationship I have with my kids.

My husband "rescued" a German Shepherd while I was gone. It is living at my in-laws house.

Lord, thank you for having them love big dogs, because I'm just not up to one.

Someone really irritated me while we were competing at camp. I hate competition with a passion and really didn't enjoy that being at the camp set me up for it again and again. This lady is very competitive and aggressive when competing. So thankfully we didn't win, and neither did she and it hasn't gotten another word. We can get along fine as long as people don't pit us against each other.

Lord, thank you for the favor of losing and for the lesson learned, though I'll never understand why people think it's okay to say things in a competitive situation that would never fly otherwise.
I know, I know, I'm too sensitive. Sigh.

Thai Spice, Little miracles, and good clean fun

I signed the kids up for "Kids night out" tonight, not so much because I needed a night off, but because a) if I didn't they wouldn't meet the quota and have to cancel and my friend wouldn't get her hours and b) they feed the kids pizza before they take them swimming. It really is a great little program.
I was kind of bummed though because I didn't have anything to do, Joe is out of town, so I dressed up anyway and thought I'd take myself out to dinner at Thai Spice. I love their Beef Pad Woon Sen. I've been craving it for weeks, but when I tried to take the kids they were packed and we couldn't get in.
I got to work and dropped off the kids to find that my beloved boss and my dear employee were both finishing up for the night. Neither of them had plans as their husbands were with their kids doing daddy things so we gleefully went out to dinner together.
Not only was the food great, we laughed the whole time. I don't know how long it's been since I've had that much fun. It was just what I needed.

Lord, thank you for Thai Spice's great food, for the miracles of meeting my friends so fortuitously and getting a table on a Friday night, and for the good clean fun we had just being girls.

Ten times ten

Some one's husband left the church recently, and it came at a hard time for her, she really struggled with her own testimony. I'm so thankful that even though Joe has no interest in the Gospel my testimony is stronger than ever and I was able to tell her to cling to the things she knows are true and they will see her through the storm of doubts.

1. My testimony is strong.

Someone lost a baby recently, and no one ever seems to know how to react after a miscarriage. She feels so many things, and I ache with her. I'm on the other side of all that, and I long to pull her to this place where sure it hurts a bit, but that pain has made you better.

2. I have learned through my losses.

I see people who get a kick out of debate. They like to argue. I can't stand contention.

3. I am a peacemaker.

My talk on Eater Sunday went really well. I wasn't nervous and the spirit was strong as I shared the scriptures and my testimony of the Savior.

4. I love to share my love for the Savior.

The High Councilman who spoke after me is kind of a fan of my son. Apparently they spent some time sitting next to each other in Primary a few weeks back and the gentleman was impressed. James can be a handful, but I'm thankful that his testimony and keen grasp of Gospel concepts shines through.

5. God is part of my children's lives.

Osama Bin Laden is dead. I am relieved he can't hurt anyone anymore, but I do not feel joy at his death.

6. I see people as Children of God.

I get to teach art camp again this summer, pending enrollment. I can't wait to pass on the techniques that will give a voice to their creative energies.

7. I am a Teacher.

My kids hug pretty much every teacher they meet, every day. They hug people at work. They hug people at church.

8. My children carry on my tradition of loving people.

I talked to a friend who needed a listening ear.

9. I do the work of God, a little every day.

My husband is away, and I'm okay. Sure I miss him and sure I'll be happy to snuggle into his chest when he gets home, but I'm fine.

10. I am secure in who I am.

Ten things, from the past ten days, ten things that are blessings worth thanks times ten. I am so rich with blessings.

Thank you Lord for blessing me ten times ten.

Busy week, catching up

I have been so worn out all week so I've neglected this, which is bad because I was so blessed this week.

It's hard to separate the days right now. Let's see, where did I leave off? Oh Tuesday. Tuesday was my birthday. I got lots of calls and E-greetings. I went and painted faces in Jordan's class, then watched the "fairytale ball." That was a great way to spend the mid-day. (To bad I forgot my camera) I then went to dinner with Joe to a little place called Thai Spice. We BOTH enjoyed our meals very much. That NEVER happens. I can't believe we agree on a restaurant now. How crazy is that? I had beef Pad Woon Sen.

Lord, thank you for a wonderful birthday.

Wednesday Joe and Tali left for their Daddy-daughter trip. James and Jordan are very jealous, and so am I, but I'm happy they get to have this time. I went to work, picked up the kids, came home and got a nap before making dinner and heading for church. I taught the girls. One of them wasn't a member, one was inactive, and one was active. I told them we were doing "Our-skittles of Faith." I wrote the 13th Article of Faith on the board and numbered every one of the 68 words. Then I told them we were memorizing it. They didn't have to memorize the whole thing, but at the end of the hour they would get a skittle for every word they did remember. The non-member got 68. The other two got 40. The best part was that the active girl is ADD and even though she was twiddling and walking around with her back to the board she did SO WELL! That's a HARD one to learn!

Lord, thank you for such a good idea. I don't know why you bless me with them when I am so scatter-brained and do everything last minute, but I love that you get through to me. Oh and thank you for presenting me with the small service I could do a friend with 5 minutes on my sewing machine, too. Thank you for all she does for ME.

Thursday, I worked a double, with mad running in between the shifts. I went to the store after the second shift to get the Easter eggs, candy, and bags to cut into baskets for the next day. I was so frazzled, trying to get every thing to add up, 60 kids times 6 eggs, so that's this pack of eggs plus these, and this combination of candy. Finally the kids and I went to the paper bag aisle and grabbed 400 bags. You know, for the 400 eggs. Instead of the 60 kids... like I would have done if I hadn't been so frazzled.
I realised the error on my way home and laughed at myself the rest of the way. The kids didn't get it.
Then I was up until 1 or so stuffing candy in eggs while I watched a Bollywood movie. I love Bollywood.

Lord, thank you for being able to laugh at myself, and for clean musicals.

Friday was the egg hunts. I took the kids for the first one. It went very well. Then I dropped the kids off with my mother-in-law. She was getting Jordan to a birthday party while I worked the evening shift, and did another egg hunt. That too went well, better than expected, especially as I got a nap between shifts. The best part was I got to work with M, who found out the other day that I too LOVE those pink and white iced animal cookies and brought a bag for all of us to share. She is so fun to work with in the first place, but then, as I grabbed my purse to leave I discovered that she had wrapped up some more cookies and put them on my purse for me to take home. Where does the woman get her resources of thoughtfulness?
Then I came home and opened a thread on my board before bed. It's a positive thought thread, and this one popped in my head, "What cannot be done through love, cannot be done." Apparently it's an original, right from God, through me, and to someone on that thread who needed it. Again, with the blessings, He is so good to me.

Lord, thank you for being so present in my life.

Today I slept in, de-ticked and bathed my poor sweet puppy, started a laundry load of his bedding, and am having pink and white iced cookies for breakfast while my dog hovers near. He is so forgiving, so sweet, and so loyal.

Lord, thank you for my dog who was there to bark if I had needed warning last night and was so sweet while I groomed him this morning.

Talk assignment, and helpful husband

I get to give a talk next Sunday. I've acctualy been a bit sad because I hadn't spoken in MONTHS, so the Bishop must have gotten the message from the Holy Ghost. He also asked me to speak on a verse that caught my attention recently and I didn't have time to dedicate to it then, so this is a real treat!

Lord, thank you for the talk assignment.

I didn't sleep well last night. My dear husband told me to go back to bed, got up, got the kids up, fed them, got them ready for school, packed the lunches, and drove them to school.

Lord, thank you for his sweet service.

Beautiful prayers, and a miracle

The kids have been saying really beautiful prayers for famliy prayer lately. I'm so thankful that they are so aware of others and include them in thier prayers.

Someone I don't even know (from the board) went into the ER with bleeding today. She is only a few weeks along. She just posted that the ultrasound came back looking good. I cried of course.

Lord, thank you for the conversations my children have with you. Thank you for Missy's Miracle.

Prayer

Yesterday this time I was a mess. I've been getting ready to query an agent, and I want so badly for it to go well. I was getting more an more nervous the closer I got to being ready.
So I asked a friend in humor if it was wrong to fast to get my book published, and she said it wasn't, and she was going to pray for me anyway.
So I asked a few other friends for prayers, and prayed myself and I feel so very muc better. There is just the slightest twinge of nerves now. Not even what I feel getting up to speak in church.

Lord, thank you for this unforseen answer to my rather selfish prayer.

Zumba and fruit

I went to Zumba tonight with Tali. We were both red in the face and drenched in sweat when we got done, but we had fun. I love that I can learn new dance moves and call it exercise. I love that there is exercise fun enough my kid can get into it with me.

Lord, thank you for Zumba.

We just fly through fruit in this house. I buy so many bananas, apples, and oranges in a month that I really should have my own farm. I love that my kids like fruit and that I have it on hand for them to eat.

Lord, thank you for fruit, and that we live in a place where it is so readily available.

Patience

Tonight was a tough night. We managed, but it was rough. It's a terrible feeling when you can't console a little one. She was tired, and the room was noisey, and there just wasn't much more we could do. Then all at once the other children checked out, and she went to sleep right away.

I'm just thankful that I can handle it as long as I do. I wasn't always able to. I guess in a way patience is just knowing that it won't last forever and then doing what it takes to make it.

Lord, thank you for teaching me patience over the years.

Swapping kids

Some wards really discourage kids sitting with anyone beside their family during Sacrament Meeting. I can see the reasoning behind it, but I'm thankful that our ward isn't like that. Today my oldest sat with a famliy who just moved in the ward. She likes thier teenage girl. My son sat with his Primary teacher. My youngest sat on the same row as me, but was really sitting most of the time with "Grandma and Grandpa Bambarger" and "Aunt" Tanya. This left me free to help the Bishops wife with her kids. When I say help I mean steal the baby who was so excited to see me that I got THREE big slobbery open mouth kisses.

Lord, thank you so much for a ward that is like a famliy. Thank you for that little boy who brightens my Sundays. Thank you for a teacher who loves James. Thank you for getting to sub for the singing time leader. Thank you for today.

Catch up, again

This past weekend was General Conference. I love General Conference, and I hate that I never get to listen to all the sessions as they happen. Life gets in the way.

This time however, I really felt that God was telling me it was okay, that He understood.

After the Saturday Morning session I had to get my kids from my mother-in-laws, only to find out as I walked out the door that she needed me to do a bunch of things for her when I got there. So I changed into work clothes and went. I hemmed some curtains, mitered some wood for a window cornice, it wasn't much, it was just time consuming. I got to spend time with her husband though, and I don't get to do that often. He cracks me up because he says a lot without saying anything, and when I say exactly what he was thinking his eyes twinkle while we laugh.

Then I had to work right after the Sunday morning session. The parents of the only two kids that came picked up the kids early, so I cleaned and went to clock out. I was ready to leave when a co-worker from another area came to gossip with the front desk girl.

"You'll never guess what we found in the ball box outside the youth gym," he says as I hurry for the door, "A Mormon Bible." I stopped dead in my tracks. I inquired what he did with it, and discovered the person he had given it to had placed it on a shelf by the front desk. As I went to check the inside cover for a name he said he didn't know any Mormons.

I laughed and then ticked off four he knew, and still didn't list all the LDS people that have a connection to my work. (I don't know how he didn't know I was LDS. The missionaries are constantly telling me they tracted into yet another person who said, "Yeah I know a Mormon, Thora is one.")

This opened up a great opportunity for me though, because I was able to have pleasant, long conversations with both him and the front desk girl about the church. I don't know if anything will come of it, but it was a rare treat to be able to answer questions in an area where there is a lot of anti stuff built into the curriculums of other churches.

It's hard, emotionally, for me to work on Sunday, especially when I have to miss Conference to do it, but it was like God was sending me a message that he understands and will bless my efforts because he knows my heart is in the right place.

Lord, thank you for blessing me so abundantly when my should's aren't happening and letting me know that my best is good enough. Thank you for giving me that time with someone who may not be around much longer. Thank you that somehow, someway, you've made me into a person who isn't a complete embarrassment to the church. Thank you for the calm nerves and the open hearts. Thank you for believing in me.

Oh and also, thank you for the new stainless steel, lighted hanging pot rack that Joe hung for today me for my upcoming birthday. I don't know how many angels you had to send to get him to remember I have wanted one for years, but I love it, and I love all the work he put into putting it up for me.

Sara

I'm far too tired to think back and write the things I'm thankful for over the last few days, so I'm going to get to the important one. One day over seven years ago a new girl came to my Internet board, and we hit it off. I would never have guessed how much she would mean to me, or how much we would go through with each other. Sometimes I wonder why she puts up with me, she does so much to get me back on track sometimes, and I'm not as good of a friend as she is. I'm so thankful I have her. Lord, Thank you for Sara and for the special bond that we share on a level so many wouldn't understand. Happy Birthday Sara love.

My mom

I'm sitting here trying to write a query letter to send in to literary agents. I seem to have no trouble turning out 70k+ words, I've done that four times, but this one page query letter is much harder. The dread is almost paralyzing. It's times like these I'm thankful for my mom. You see, she taught me to sew, she taught me how to change the oil, she taught me to use my nose when seasoning food, but most of all she taught me that I can do anything I set my mind to. Then she proved the validity of her belief to me by setting her own lofty goals and then reaching them. So, I'm going to keep writing until I get it right, because I can do this, I have all the talent and tenacity it takes. Lord, thank you for my mom. (Happy Birthday Mom)

Moments of sanity

It's been a crazy day. In between all the rushing and working I had several little windows of quiet time with people I care about. I'm thankful for those moments. Lord, thank you for those moments and the love that was felt in them.

Misting

That's what I call it when the raindrops are so teeny-tiny that they don't seem to be falling, but kind of hang there instead. It's not really mist, but it's pretty close, and I love the way it feels to walk through it. It's not plop, plop, plop or even pitter, pitter, it's a million tiny cold wet kisses all landing on your skin. Lord, thank you for misting.

Little things

I'm not feeling the least bit deep today. I'm barely awake at my keyboard, but I'm running late on the posts, again, so here goes. I'm thankful for Terro Ant bait, because it really works. I'm thankful for my single pair of sweats, because as much as I would like to look great all the time there are times I don't give an ant's mandible what I look like, and sweats are nice to have at those times. I'm thankful for my new blue sheets, I think they are pretty. Lord, thank you for the little things, but mostly for getting me through the evening. Goodnight.

A song that says it right

I made this with some friends. This could have been a "Things" post, or a "Thoughts" post, but it is here because I'm so thankful for this song. There are so many times when words fail us. "I'm sorry," "There's a reason," "I know how you feel," so often they are the wrong words. This song, says it right.

Lord, thank you for this song and for all the selfless contributions that added so much to this video.

Heads at my hip

Twice today I was surprised to find someone standing at my hip, wanting to be close to me. They weren't my usual snugglers, so I was very happy to get to hold them. The rest of the day I felt like I was doing everything wrong in my life, so those little moments meant a lot.

Lord, thank you that even on a bad day I was able to bring some good.

The Internet and comfortable arms

Yesterday James and I completed his science project. I forgot to take a picture, but it was a huge model of the solar system. I had no idea what color the planets were. Luckily someone did know and made a lovely web page about it.

Lord, thank you for the Internet so I can get my answers easily.

Today I was at work with the kids, Tali had swim lessons. The little kids room was slotted to have 14 at once, three of which were babies. So I clocked in and worked for an hour or so. It was mayhem for a bit, and there was a pair of little girls I didn't know. I saw that they were upset and sitting out of the way, so I went and sat with them and offered comfort. I'm so glad they took it. I was a complete stranger, but within minutes one was clinging to me. The other fell asleep in my arms 15 minutes later.

Lord, thank you for my comfortable arms, and all the love that lies between them that I can share.

Relief and Automatic hole punches

Man I was sick yesterday. I ignored the warning signs of course, but when it hit it hit hard and I was out of commission. When I got home from church I immediately hit the couch and wrapped up in that super warm blanket from Bahrain. It was warm in the house, but I was so cold. I just lay there and shivered and wished I could warm up. My body was aching too. The only thing that didn't hurt was the ends of my fingers, which I couldn't feel at all. My nail beds were blue, my fingertips pale. The quarter inch below the dead zone hurt like crazy though, so did my waist which was being attacked my my support hose.
After an hour I got up the strength to move to the room and change into pajamas. I shook the whole time. I climbed under the two blankets and the electric blanket and turned it on. It was another hour at least before I got the feeling back in my finger tips, and even longer before I felt like my temperature was normal.
My body was screaming still, in spite of the Tylenol. Joe turned on some tv for me, which helped a bit. The light hurt my eyes, but at least I could think about something beside how much it hurt to lay on my back, or turn over, or raise my head, or move my arms to drink.
My body switched from cold to hot, so I kicked off the covers and tried to figure out how I was going to get my shifts covered for the week if this didn't go away. I didn't figure out much, I couldn't think, it hurt too much to think.
I fell asleep at some point, and woke up in the middle of the night. I was amazed to discover I didn't hurt anymore and my temperature was normal.

Lord, thank you for the relief.

This morning I printed out my latest first draft. Then I took it to work with me and used the automatic 3-hole punch there so I could bind it. Oh the bliss of not having to put my wrist through all that work!

Lord, thank you for Automatic hole punches.

My Sweet Brother

I think he was training for raising my son. I was full of mixed emotions as I talked to him tonight. The Navy, what a big step. He's going to rock that white suit though.

Lord, Thank you for Joseph.

Changing tastes

I used to hate avacado, really hate it. I just sliced up some and put it on my salad. There was no need for dressing because my salad was just soooooo good.

Lord, thank you for my grown up taste-buds.

Turn that frown upside-down

Today didn't start well. It's St. Patrick's Day, and ever since I was a kid I've resented that while I can't find any Irish on my family tree, and I'm not Catholic either, I am threatened with repeated physical assault if I do not participate in this Holiday. It's not that I mind celebrating Ireland and all, it's just that it's MANDATORY.
That irritates me, and probably always will.
So I was in a bad mood, but because I work with kids, I put on a green shirt, green eyeliner with clovers at the corners of my eyes, and then went to work on the kids.
At the last minute I grabbed my bag of face painting supplies and took them to work with me. I got to spend the morning drawing all over people's faces. It started with my co-worker, and the kids. Then I painted on my boss when she popped in. Then the next thing I knew I was painting mothers who came through the door, employees who had forgotten their green, and members I don't even know who saw someone else and wanted to join in on the fun.

I love face painting. It is so much fun.

Lord, thank you for turning my frown upside-down.

Good dentist visit

Tali had her first filling today. I know, having a cavity is not considered a "good visit" by most, but I was just worried how her first drilling would go. With all the things medical professionals have had to do to her in the past... it could have been bad.

It went really well and she was a trooper.

Lord, thank you for making this first filling a good experience for her.

Fun with the girls

Tonight was the R.S. Birthday potluck. We had a pretty good turn out, and my voice is pretty horse from calling out for bids on the service items. I now owe a 5X7 pencil portrait and an hour of Bellydance instruction. You should have seen how they bid on the baked goods too, lol. It was soooooo much fun.
I think the funnest part was when we offered 200 points to anyone who told their most embarrassing moment. I was laughing so hard I could barely stand.

Lord, thank you for helping the meeting go well and thank you so very very much for the love we have as sisters.

Good timing, pitching in, and return to health

I knew it was coming. When you see your employees dropping like flies you can just tell you are going to get the flu. So when that first wave of nausea hit, I knew just what it was. To tell the truth though, my next thought was, "Well at least I'm getting it now, instead of Tuesday." Tuesday is the RS Birthday Dinner and Service Auction. I did not want to miss that.
So I went and got my kids from my mil's, and got back home in time to battle off the second major wave of nausea. I had to use my pressure points for that one, and they worked! Oh the tricks you learn during pregnancy.
I was sick the rest of Saturday, then all of Sunday. I'd feel ill every time I stood, or rolled over, or the bed moved. So I laid there in bed, occasionally pressing my thumbs into the insides of my wrists, and watched tv. Joe fed the kids. What I'm not sure, but they ate. Plus, I didn't have to play referee at all. Now I'm all better and ready to go to work tonight.

Lord, thank you that when I got this it was at a time when the world didn't fall apart because I was sick. Thank you that Joe stepped up and pitched in so I could be sick in peace. Thank you that I'm better now and back to my life.

Good examples, the scents of home

I have a friend who has decided she's just not going to complain anymore. She's my hero.

Lord, thank you for friends who are such good examples.

When I hold or hug a kid at work I like to sniff their hair. It's not because they have perfumed shampoo. It's because they smell like their mother's cooking, or like the cream that helps contain all those downy curls. There's something about those scents that mean love to me, that mean home and care and nurture. Scents are just that way, they mean something. Like, even though my mom doesn't drink Pepsi anymore, the smell of it always makes me think of her. Sometimes I smell a man's shaving cream and I'll think of my dad. Pine trees always make me think of the first house my parents owned. All such beautiful memories brought on by the scent of home.

Lord, thank you for the scents of home.

Unexpected kindness, Little feet, and wet roads

Today was pretty crazy, so instead of coming back home between getting the car back and church we used Tali's student of the week award to bring down the cost of a dinner out. The certificate was to a local Buffet, where my children are regular customers with their Grandma. The servers are all very nice to us, and today ours was particularly nice. He brought over two kids meal certificates for us, just out of the blue. It was so very sweet of him.

Lord, thank you for unexpected kindness.

It's silly and small, but a little girl at church is up and walking, though she gets passed around so much it's a miracle she's had a chance to learn, lol. I watched her standing there, so sure and steady on those little itty bitty feet and it just melted my heart.

Thank you Lord, for little feet.

I know wet roads are dangerous, but I've noticed the last few times it has rained heavily that there is a really luminous feeling to the main road here when it rains. The lights reflect off the wet roads and the clouds in a way that is different than anywhere I have ever lived before. It is really beautiful, at least to me it is.

Lord, thank you for how beautiful that wet road is, and for keeping us safe on it.

Working with people I enjoy

I've worked with a lot of people over the years, and I like pretty much everyone. People I truly enjoy though? Those are harder to find.
I truly enjoy spending time with several people I work with, and it makes such a difference.

Lord, thank you for bringing us together.

Plants, Rain, Likeness, Kindness, Opportunities, Little Miracles, Innate goodness, and Healthy snacks

The flowers are out. Well the ones on the north side of the house aren't, they are just barely pushing up leaves. The daffodils on the west side and the rose-of-Sharron's on the south are in full bloom. I looked at the bushes we planted last year and they seem to have flourished somehow.

Lord, thank you for plants that survive me.

As I type this it is raining. Some people find the rain depressing, I find it romantic and comforting. It's like God's efforts at watering the plants is a reminder for me to take care of me.

Lord, thank you for the rain.

Today as I taught my lesson I saw a woman remove her coat and creep forward two rows to wrap it around an elderly woman. Watching that while someone read a scripture about how we can become one with God... it was such a special moment.

Lord, thank you for letting me see your likeness in her.

I dropped my car off to be fixed on Friday without making the call to let the adjuster know I was going to in advance like should have, and yet the adjuster got over there that same day. I'll have my car back that much sooner. I could hear the surprise in his voice when I thanked him for it, but I really was grateful.

Lord, thank you for people who do the kind thing without thinking.

Someone asked a question online, and I was able to respond with my testimony. I needed that, I need the spirit that comes when I bear my testimony.

Lord, thank you for those special opportunities.

After having presidency meeting Wednesday night I ran into two women who we mentioned we have been missing. I very much enjoyed chatting with each of them briefly and sharing our sincere love for them.

Lord, thank you for the little miracle of putting me in the exactly right place at the exactly right instant.

My in-laws needed their yard mowed. Even with the riding lawn mower, they just can't do it anymore. Joe went and did it without any nagging.

Lord, thank you for the goodness in him.

My kids just came in and asked for yogurts, which of course they were allowed. I love how, even with all the junk food they get at Grandma's they still really enjoy the healthy snacks I keep on hand.

Lord, thank you for delicious healthy food.

Birds

There are birds outside my window, I woke to them tweeting this morning. I also listened to two different bird calls on the way to the car and wondered what kinds of birds they were. We see owls, falcons, jays, crows, vultures, cardinals, and hummingbirds in various seasons, and I just love it. I envy them really, being able to fly.

Lord, thank you for birds and the way they make my heart flutter with joy.

This is redundant

but I'm so tired right now, I'm just thankful that once I get done yelling at the cell phone company I can go get in bed and not get out again until morning.

Thank you Lord that one way or another all days come to an end.

Way behind

and to tell you the truth right now I'm so rushed and buried I can't even think. So I'm thankful that I got off work early and will have time to clean before the appraiser comes in the morning.

Lord, thank you for small favors.

Now... time to clean.

Babys who can sleep through mayhem

Title says it all.

Thank you Lord for helping him sleep, I know all that havoc was a little overwhelming to him.

Being popular

There is nothing in the world like walking in a door and having a bunch of little kids run up to hug you. I wasn't popular in school, not in the least, but I'm making up for it now.

Lord, thank you for the tiny tots and their hugs.

Good books and lots of pillows

Last night I borrowed Tali's library book, Tuck Everlasting. It was very good, and I very much enjoyed the descriptive language. I love imaginative writing.

Today when Joe got up for the day I made the bed and cleaned the room. My sister gave us pillows for Christmas which has ended the pillow stealing. I arranged them nicely, Stacked up like big thick envelopes, invitations to come and rest. It's funny how some things just make me smile.

Lord, thank you for good books, and for a mountain of pillows to rest on while I read them.

Gratitude itself

I spent some time on Babycenter today, something I haven't done in months. There was a troll, of course, again, someone pretending to be what they aren't. It's awful being lied to, and it made me feel icky to even see people posting to the troll's thread.

So I clicked on another thread "How many kids did you have by 28? Would you change anything?" Responding to that question brought back a lot of memories, of my babies, and the ones I lost. My heart filled with gratitude for what I have, for the joy and pain that I've gone through that has made me so much better, kinder, more understanding.

So carrying that forward I started a thankful thread, and my inbox has been dinging with new posts ever since. Good women are posting away, feeling the spirit of gratitude, which is the Spirit of God.

Lord, thank you for the power of gratitude and the effect it has on the whole soul.

Life done right

I worked this morning with an amazing woman. She is so humble and sweet I think people overlook her, but every time I spend time with her I leave thankful that I know her. Just talking about our schedules and lives while waiting for the kids to show up I realised that she is really doing things right. God didn't hand her a silver platter life, but she loves her life, she loves God, and she lives her life for God and her kids.

Lord, thank you for women like that, who set such an example for me.

Brilliant smiles amid the tears

I met this little baby today. She was so cute. It upset her to be away from her family, but if you could get her to smile it was this whole face thousand watt kind of smile.

Lord, thank you for those smiles and the joy they brought me.

The industrial revolution

Sometimes I wonder, do machines really make life better?
Naturally I don't mean the centrifuge or what ever other machines doctors use. Those are no-brainers in the life-bettering area. And, yes, I understand that technology has built upon itself so that each new device is the culmination of the ones before and the ones before are vital links in the chain of progress.
I just... I think our lives are too complicated, too automated, too saved by "labor saving devices." It's like we are liberated to the point where we have nothing to stand on and nothing to hold on to. Oh I could think about this for aged if I let myself, but I won't.
I will however state that the washing machine is a must in my book. I've washed clothes by hand, and I don't know how on earth women who had to do it all the time ever got anything else done.
Lord, thank you for bringing me to Earth at a time and place, when I can have a washing machine. I really do appreciate it.

Going to Church, Insurance, Experience, and Perspective

Wow I really am behind on this... sigh. Life is crazy.

Sunday I was so glad to be back at church. It's crazy how much you miss in such a short time. Church is something that re-fills my cup, so I'm so glad the kids were well enough to go.

Monday was manic, I went to work, came home and worked on the house. Then went back to work, then put a dent in the car on the way home. I'm fine, and it's only a car. The insurance will pay for most of it. I just wish the yellow pole had been taller. But yeah, it's only a car.

Tuesday was more work, and I'm still sore from it. Amazing how the motivation of an appraiser coming can get you through your to-do list. I thought, half way through the day that it's a good thing we've learned all these skills and that we have the right tools. There is no way we could have done all this without the backgrounds we have.

Today has been another long day, but right now they all feel that way. While driving down the road I remembered passing the same place this fall and bright yellow leaves were twirling and spinning down from a tree, gilding the street in fall brilliance. That moment had been deliriously happy. I remembered that in that moment I thanked God for allowing me these wonderful times between the stressful times. I knew life would take another turn, I know very well that life is about growing, but those moments between are so beautiful, and I'm thankful that I know I'll have more of them soon. This is just a moment.

Lord, Thank you so much for the chance I have to go to Church each week. Thank you for Insurance to make up for my blunders. Thank you for the experience that I have gained in my mere 31 years. Thank you for perspective, and the peace it brings me.

Everyday heroes and Conversation

Last night after work I stopped by the church for the ward Valentine's Day party. For the first part I mostly just danced with the grandkids of some friends that were there. The teens, for some reason, think standing in a circle and slightly moving to the beat qualifies as dancing... sigh kids these days. So I had fun anyway. The whole ward knows I'm a nut, so it's not like I had to be embarrassed to be dancing with a six year old, a four year old, and a nine month old. Sister Xob Liam does crazy stuff like that. In fact a friend even came up and asked me to teach her the country swing that I had been showing the six year old. So I dance with her too.
I was about to give up however and go home. It had been a long day, I'd worked a double (kids were at Grandma's), and I can only do just so much to try and help the poor teens. Just then they announced a game of musical chairs. While they set up I said a few goodbyes, but caught the end of the first round.
The music stopped and a 4 year old boy was left without a chair. I smiled with pride as a young man who didn't even know the boy quietly got up and stepped to the side while the others excitedly showed the boy to the chair that was vacant, like he still had a chance to win if he hurried.
I resumed my goodbyes and the next round started, and when the music stopped again there was that boy, out again, except that the young man who had beat him to the last chair scooped him on to his lap and another young man snuck away to the side. Now I was interested, so I lingered, watching.
From then on the little boy was right by his new friend's side. When the music stopped they were there, stacked two deep in a chair the others made sure they got. Round after round the chairs dwindled, until it was one chair, and three boys.
That round lasted an eternity, and we all laughed and cheered over the antics of the two teens and the 4 year old. Suddenly the music stopped and, before he even realised it was time to sit, the boy had been scooped up by both teens and planted in the victory seat.
I love that there are still heroes in the world.

Today I have been able to spend quite a bit of time with Joe. That doesn't happen often, between our work schedules and life in general we are like two ships, rocking on each other's wakes. Today he stayed up really late. We got some work done at his Mom's house, went to lunch all seven of us, then the kids went home with her and I brought Joe home to sleep. Instead of sleeping like he should he sat and talked with me for a while, about art and fences, and who knows what else, you know just talked. It wasn't a power meeting about how to handle the hurdles we are up against, it wasn't catch up time on all the information the other doesn't have. It wasn't strategy planning for handling the kids. It was just talk. It was nice.

Lord, thank you for everyday heroes, and for for long conversations with my husband.

Dave

I haven't seen him in years, but today I'm thankful for Dave. He was our Doctor in Ohio. The first time we met him he saved Tali's life. After that I didn't want to see anyone else, and it was a good thing, because he took such good care of us. He was in his residency at the begining, but when he set up his own practice an hour from hour home we gladly made the commute.

He just listened so well, not like any Doctor I had ever known. He also thought about us when we weren't in the room, like we were family and not just patients. He delivered both Jay and Jordi, beautifully I may add.

I'm afraid that for the rest of my life I will forever hold every medical professional up to him, and they will all fall short.

Lord, thank you so much for putting us in the right place, at the right time, and in the right hands.

Cute little boys

I was surrounded by them today, and these little guys were just so cute and sweet. The two girls were sweet too, but the 9 little boys were a lot of fun today.

I was holding a baby boy in the hall, letting him watch the people in the pool away from the noise of the other kids for a while. A co-worker walked by and said, "You have the best job in the world." I heartily agreed.

Lord, thank you for all of those sweet little moments with little boys today.

The Moms of My Readers

Sometimes I think my writing is no good. It's usually just a moment when I give into the nagging fear all writers have at the back of their mind.

There are moments though, that I can use as a ruler, even if they don't give me an accurate measure I can slap that nagging fear across the knuckles and continue with my writing. I cling to those moments, they mean the world to me.

Last night I met the mother of a friend. She came into my work and when I realised who I was talking to she smiled and said of course she knew who I was, her daughter spoke of me so often and read me so often.

Naturally I blushed and ducked my head. She must be a very good mother to keep track of the names of people in her daughter's life like that, but the way she said it, it was such a compliment. I love it when people express to me how much they like my work, but for them to turn around and talk to their families and friends is HUGE!

Lord, thank you for the mothers of my readers that so very kindly let me know that my work is truly enjoyed.

Yearly CPR training

One class down, one more to go and I'll be re-certified for the year. I'm so glad we have this available to us at work, and that K is there to answer questions and patiently teach us.

Lord, thank you for a job where one of the perks is that I get to sleep a little better at night.

Netflix, blankets, and people to pick up the slack

Wednesday afternoon Jordan came home with a fever. Thursday afternoon James came home with a fever. Friday afternoon Talitha came home with a fever.

Sure we have Tylenol, which relieves the aches and pains and fever, but then I've got three kids feeling just good enough to irritate each other, and feeling just bad enough not to want to focus that energy on anything productive.

So Netflix has been on almost constantly, the stack of snugly blankets has been in use, and thankfully I've been able to miss work and stay home with them thanks to kind people who pick up the slack.

I'm just praying I don't get this.

Drugs are not a part of my life

I was thinking today, as I cooked, about the different trials we face in our lives. Some are given one weakness, others are given another.
Today I'm thankful that drugs have never been a weakness of mine. I've had very close friends hooked on them. I've spent a lot of time watching drunks. I've known a lot of people that have done drugs at one point or another.
It's funny because I was never really tempted to even try them. Not that they weren't offered, but somehow I just wasn't interested.
My own personal brand of trials has lead me to rock bottom an back, but drugs? No, and I'm thankful for that. I've seen what they do to a person, and I would never want to loose myself like that.

Lord, thank you for giving me that path I've had.

Little miracles

The person who is teaching me to make fried rice called to postpone by a day, and then Jordan came home with a fever and I wouldn't have been able to go anyway.

Lord, thank you for looking out for me.

Things are back in place

I am so sore and so tired. I've been painting in the kitchen all day. The wall that Joe made me paint back to white, well it's really white now and not just primer over the red. The nook for the washer, dryer, and fridge is done now too. All white.

Joe got up after I had moved the appliances back in the nook and took a long look. He asked me what I thought, I told him I would have been happier with it red. He shrugs and says, "So paint it red, I don't care."

Yeah... the look of death happened. Somehow he survived.

Lord, I thank thee for getting me though this day and that I won't have to move the appliances again for a long time.

Tax software

Lord, thank you so much for smart people who make tax software, I really stink at math.

A Church Journal

I don't know which General Authority it was, or which Stake leader it was that quoted him, but because of their words I started keeping a journal in my church bag. I sit there in meetings, writing away, sometimes paraphrasing the things I hear, but often just writing down the things I don't hear, but needed to hear. I really do get more out of meetings this way.

Thank you Lord, for inspiration passed down through my leaders, that lead to personal inspiration. I am so very thankful that both channels are open to me.

Simple service

We had a baptism tonight, ANOTHER! God has just opened the windows and poured out blessings on our little ward. I kind of got caught up doing other things today so I was a bit late, okay really late. My contribution to the meal afterward was two bags of store bought meatballs that I cooked in tomato sauce right there at the church.
I was a real Martha, missing the talks to set up tables and chairs, stir the food, quiet the kids, close the doors. I got to see the ordinance, but the rest... yeah I was "cumbered about much serving" and kicking myself for missing the meeting part of the evening.
I did notice though that the floor in the Relief Society room needed attention. Small wonder with all the traffic it has gotten lately. So after we ate I grabbed the vacuum and headed in to do it.
The ward mission leader poked his head in at one point and said, "The Lord sees what you are doing, and you'll get paid." I smiled at him as I continued to work and he left, but then my heart filled completely as my answer rang out from the deepest depths of my soul, "He's already paid me, more than I could ever repay!"

Funny that the best part of my day was pushing a vacuum, just doing simple service that was for no one else but Him.

Lord, thank you for accepting my simple act of service as a token of my love for you and my gratitude for all you have done for me.

Fun clothes

I saw a picture the other day of a little girl inside the laundry basket, playing with the clothes.

I used to do that. I loved clothes even way back then.

Lord, thank you for the rich variety of clothes I own and have access to. Thank you for making me a clothes horse.

People who love people with special needs

(this is my post for yesterday)

Sometimes I feel like I'm on the inside on the best secret ever. Funnily enough it's not a secret that we insiders share and don't want to get out; it's just something that others, somehow, don't understand:

People with special needs are one of God's greatest gifts to us.

Luckily for me, through my work and unique family situation I know a lot of people who share this understanding. They may not even understand what it is they understand. They may simply call it loving to help, but whether they would put it in the same words as I, or not, they know. We know that by helping people with special needs we are helping God help us, that we are helping them help others to God, that we are privileged to know them.

Lord, thank you for people who love people with special needs.

My kids have a Momma

I can't really go into the details, and it's not like I know all of them anyway, but I know a little girl whose mom is not around.
It breaks my heart to think of anyone not having a mom. I know any good woman will take any time she is allowed to give that girl a little mothering, like I got to do today, but it isn't enough. Kids deserve to have a mom in their lives.

I know I'm not the best mom, far from it, but at least I'm here and trying. I'm so thankful that somewhere along the way I made some choice that lead me to being here, to having what I have, to being a loving mother.

Lord, thank you for giving my children someone to hold them.

A good job

I don't know how it is that we have been so fortunate for so long. We took a pay cut for a while during the "downturn" but my husband has been well employed our entire marriage. We have had health insurance our entire marriage.

I know this is a very rare thing, and I know people who's homes are being re-possessed right now and they are looking states away to share a roof with family.

Lord, thank you so much for our steady employment, for not making me face my children's hunger with nothing to combat it. Please, please be with my friends and help me find a way to help them.

Snuggly little boys

We had a new kid tonight. I scooped him up to show him the toys and then he just wanted to be held from then on. I love it when they are snuggly like that. It just makes my day.

Lord, thank you for snuggly little boys.

Best Friends, note the plural

I've lived all over the place, and along the way I've met some very rare souls. I get along with nearly everyone I meet, and try to love even the ones I don't get along with, but there are some people that are just "the best."

They just get me, they take all my idiosyncrasies into stride, they are loyal and loving, they are my best friends. They are the kind of friend I would cheerfully hack off a limb for, though I'd run out of limbs if they all needed one. Thankfully they are content with a listening ear and their own personal suite in my heart.

I'm so blessed to have them, all of them, and each of them individually. I'm so thankful that my love has been multiplied to include them.

Thank you Lord, for my best friends, near and far.

The Ward Family

My ward is not perfect. Our Sacrament Meeting attendance rate is... well really low. Everyone struggles, everyone wears multiple hats, and yet I love it. I love my ward. I love the people in my ward and they way they take care of each other. I love the love I feel from people in the ward and the support I get.

Lord, thank you for my ward family, and for giving us this love that we share.

Another's Blessing

My friend arrived at her house to find fire trucks. The fire was contained in the chimney and the damage is localised. It could have been so much worse.

Lord, thank you for protecting them.

Water Aerobics

I took my first water aerobics class today. I can't take regular aerobics anymore. I've got a bum heel on one side and a bum knee on the other. Nothing terribly serious but bad enough I can't push it. Just running around the gym with the kiddos can put me in pain the next day.

Water aerobics has me sore too, but in that I got a good workout kind of way. I took the advice of my friends and put a float belt on and went down to the deep end for it. That way I didn't use my feet and couldn't aggravate either joint.

Thank you Lord for humbling me enough to listen to exercise-smart people and get in the pool.

Understanding Call Center Employees

I wrote the checks, I put them in the envelopes. I put the envelopes in the bags, but Jordan's did not make it to her teachers hands, and therefore not to the photographer's hands.

Discovering this I pinned my hopes on picture re-take day. I watched for the notice, I kept the date in mind, and then it slipped my mind that morning and I was out of luck.

Or was I?

The school sent home little ID cards with the kids, and on them was a picture code and a telephone number. I called it today and the lady on the line pulled Jordi's pictures right up. Normally they would have charged me an arm and a leg for a special order of the prints, but when I explained the above scenario to her, the woman took pitty on me and let me have the package at the price I would have paid for it originally, plus shipping.

Lord, thank you for people who understand lost envelopes and first graders and for putting one on the phone with me today.

A quick mind

Okay, another one of those post that will make me look big headed, but I have to express this so I can finish wrapping my head around it and get some sleep.

So, I'm sitting there next to someone I don't even know, discussing a variety of topics from Art to Zoroastrianism (literally, we discussed both) and I get a text message to my phone. It was from one of the college students I know via work who has taken a shine to the kids and I. She needs help, bad, because she has to write a 5 paragraph essay on what she thinks Racism is.

Now, I remember when 5 paragraph essays scared me, because no one had explained to me how to structure them. After that, well I churned them out daily in 45 minutes. Man, I'd love to write an essay on Racism, but I'd need a lot more than 5 paragraphs. It's a subject I have thought about a lot over the years.

So I texted her back (and called her when I got home to get her ball rolling) but that moment started me thinking.

I am smart, and I'm smart about a lot of stuff.

There's stuff I am not good at, like math. The way people take a completely abstract set of rules and treat it like it's the most concrete thing in the world is mind boggling to me. People say "2+2=4, always, it's unchanging," and I look at them like they have two heads. What on earth is 2? Seriously.

But I am good at understanding other things, and tonight I am so very thankful for that. I am so thankful that I have this hunger to learn, weather it is from my spirit, my genetics, or my upbringing, I have this precious gift of a sharp and understanding mind. I'm thankful for the opportunities that I have had of improving my mind, the people that have aided me, and most of all I am so thankful for the things that I never have to question again because my spirit now knows them.

Lord, thank you for making me like you did, and teaching me like you have. I feel so unusually blessed, and I'm sure I don't deserve it, but I am truly grateful.

No Carpet

Man I get so frustrated with myself, I keep forgetting to do this. I guess I need to get it at a solid time in my schedule, like to do it with my scripture reading before bed or something.

So, this is yesterday's post and I'll have to post again tonight.

Yesterday I was thankful I don't have carpet in my house. I had a sick kid, and well, I'm sure you can imagine how fun that was to clean up at 1:30 or so, but it was nothing to what it could have been if I had carpet in the hall between her room and the bathroom. The poor thing felt so bad, she's such an angel even when she's sick.

Lord, thank you for giving me the foresight to not have carpet, and for M who covered my shift so I could stay home with my sick baby.

What I needed, not what I wanted

I had prayed that my voice be returned to me by today. Sunday is hands down my favorite day of the week, and a big part of that is getting to sing hymns. I thought surely the Lord could give me that little concession as it was part of my worship.

Oh how wrong I was, and how right He was. I couldn't sing. Not only did it hurt, my voice wouldn't stay even in the right octave. So I sat and listened and read along with the hymns.

I'm so thankful that He gave me the chance to do that. The spirit was so strong, the words were so poignant, and James' sweet voice ringing in my ear was so sweet.

He is often in a mood all of sacrament, and I had forgotten how lovely his voice is. I told him how beautiful it was, and he said, "I know, I got it from you Mom." It was so touching to hear the words I have so often spoken uttered by another generation.

I also picked up the quiet but skilled Alto coming from the new face down the bench. She has just started coming to our ward because she is now 30 and no longer in the singles ward. I am terribly excited to have her in our ward. It was like God was saying, no you can't have your show-off-soprano today, but you can have a new sister instead. I think she and I will be great friends.

O Lord, thank you so much for giving me what I needed instead of granting my selfish desire. I love you.

A soft, warm blanket and kind employees

(Another two day post, but in my defence the Tylenol wasn't working last night. )

I'm sick. Just some little cold. I wouldn't let it bother me except that it's taken away my voice. Usually to lose my voice like this I have to cough and hack for a week, but this time it was gone before I was even sure I was sick.
Naturally, alternately sounding like a bird and a man with throat cancer makes me sound a lot sicker than I feel. The sinus meds aren't helping, making me sleepy.
Yesterday I decided I'd better call off for my evening shift, so I called an employee and she was kind enough to switch Friday nights with me. It was really kind of her to re-arrange her life like that for me, just so I don't get the kiddos sick.

I am also thankful for our warm blankets. It's such a little thing, but for thousands of years people have shivered under itchy wool blankets, and I've got downy faux fleece throws to rub on my face as I cuddle under them.

Lord, thank you for the kind people and the comforts in my life that make sick days so pleasant.

The smell of food

Right now I have a pork roast in the oven. It's in a bag with soy sauce, garlic, onion, and a little liquid smoke. It smells so very very good. I've been enjoying the scent for hours and just realised what a beautiful thing it is to have the house full of delectable scents that don't make my lungs seize and throat close up like perfumes and air fresheners do.

Thank you Lord, for the wonderful smell of my dinner.

It didn't happen to me

I'll admit it, I should have written this an hour ago, before I got the call that there is no school tomorrow. This means a shift at work when I was going to spend the morning away from kids and all kid related things, grumble grumble sigh.

But then I remembered that a tsunami just hit Australia and millions of people are worried about loved ones or homeless, or dead.

Perspective, eh?

Lord, I thank you that my home has not been hit by a tsunami and my loved ones are all safe and sound. Please, please be with the people who have been impacted by this tragedy, and please forgive me for being so shallow.

Snow suits and driving skills

I don't know how I missed doing this yesterday.... sigh.

I think I'm the only person in a ten mile radius that has snowsuits for all of their kids. After all, where would they get them? They certainly don't stock them here. We got them last year in PA and bought big so they would last more than a year. We will have to get Tali a new one next year I am sure, but the others will just have hand me downs.
So they went out and played in the snow, all snug and cozy in thier suits, after they cleaned thier rooms. The dog had so much fun going in and out and romping in the snow with the kids.

I wrote a chapter, yipee!

Today I need to go to work, and I've got a great big truck to do it in. That's just a fringe benefit, the truth is I'm not freaked out like some people because I've lived in places where snow is a common thing and I know how to handle it pretty well.

Thank you Lord for snowsuits and all the years I lived in the snowbelt.

Brother Shaw

He's our teacher in Gospel Doctrine, and I just love him. Truthfully I don't think I've ever disliked a Gospel Doctrine teacher, but Brother Shaw brings this energy to class and I just love him for it.

Thank you Lord, for Brother Shaw.

Annual events

Some we look forward to, like Christmas. Others we dread, like science fair time, incidentally right after Christmas.
I'm just glad these things happen just once a year, so we don't wear out the good ones and we don't have to live through the bad ones monthly.

Lord, thank you for the wisdom with which you have ordered the world.

Bobby the Pizza guy

Funny how one person you hardly know can make your day. Bobby works at Papa Johns, the only pizza we like, he's one of the managers. Since going off tomatoes I thought my pizza days were over, until I discussed it with Bobby and he told me if he is working he will personally make me a pizza with ranch instead of tomato sauce.
My hero.
Lord, thank you for Bobby and other people like him who make life so good with their thoughtfulness.

Eventuality

This really was a wonderful day, filled with so many things to be thankful for. I got a good review at work, I had a lovely lunch with two ladies I love to bits and crumbs, I got to write while two kids were in the pool and one was doing homework. I am so very, very blessed and I really am so thankful for those things.

However, right now, foremost on my mind is that come Monday, Tali turns in the science project and the torture of completing it with her will be over.

I'd like to know how they expect a 4th grader to follow the 17 pages of "helpful information" that make my eyes glaze over and my stubborn side kick in.
She doesn't even know what a bibliography is and she's supposed to write one? Wait, you think I'm going to find a book at the library on this to even cite? ARGGGHH! People I GOOGLED potato battery! Our library is tiny!

Sigh.

Lord, thank you for trials with an expiration date.

The mantle

If I hadn't seen it so many times and felt it myself I don't know if I would believe in it, but there is something special that happens when a Bishop or a President is called. I can remember so clearly the strength and overpowering spirit that came with my call as Primary President. I see that same thing in the RSP's that I have served with, I see it in the Bishops. I am so thankful that it is there, that God sends this overflowing love for the people we serve to flow through us, that he sustains us as we strive to do his work.

Thank you Lord, for the mantle of our callings.

Beautiful Music

As I write this my iPod is updating with the music from the CD I just got off of Ebay. It's called "Apricot Blossoms Against the Sky" by Chang Jing. Ms. Chang does the most incredible music and I have been checking my online sources regularly for real copies of her music.
I REALLY want her CD "Open Music" but it came out in 2005 and no one seems to have it. So this one will do. The tracks are lovely, incredible really. Here, see what I mean about her music. That's Breathe, her most popular song. See? Amazing.

Lord, I thank you for the beautiful music you inspire in people around the world and for the tools that bring it to my soul.

Competent people

We had several kids in the room tonight. One started throwing up. I had a baby in my arms, so without a second thought my employee just jumped in and handled it. I kept putting the baby down to handle the other kids, and fetching and such, but she just handled it like a pro.

Lord, thank you for her, not just because I didn't have to clean it up, but because she's like this about everything. She makes my life so much easier and brighter.

Catching up, again.

Man, I keep slipping up, but I blame Joe, lol. We so rarely sleep on the same schedule that when he's ready for a nap I often skip everything so I can go with him. Beds are so much warmer with two.

Yesterday I was very thankful that my simple lesson went so well. On first Sunday we have the Asian sisters in the room with us. We love having them there, but they usually have a separate class. This is because it is hard to get through even a few key points when you are doing it in three languages. They manage in two languages weekly (because they are completely amazing!) but are kind enough to translate for us on first Sunday so we can have them in the room.
I based the lesson off of a few inspiring verses in Deuteronomy chapters 5 and 6, with a little Matthew and Mark mixed in. It was about having the Lord at the right place, at the front of your mind and always in your heart.

The kids and I also finished listening to the Book of Mormon on the way to church. Those last two chapters cover some off the scale stuff, in both extremes. I thought about how desperate the situation was for Mormon and Moroni, and yet how STRONG they were because of it. It gives me hope for the future, that when things do go from bad to worse we as individuals can go from good to better.

Today I am thankful that my kids got ready so quickly this morning. I was dreading the fight to get them out of bed, and it was a bit tough, but once they were going it went really well. Not only did we get to school on time, I got home and back to school in time to give James the forgotten backpack before class started.

Lord, I thank thee for thy attendant spirit, and for obedient children.

4 Souls

Four boys were baptised tonight.

Lord, thank you for the little things you set in motion years ago that made this happy day possible.